Begin With the End in Mind

It was Steven Covey, author of the popular book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, who coined the phrase, "Begin with the end in mind."

Most of us know that New Year Resolutions we make at the beginning of each New Year usually last until the next setback or challenge we face.

However, if we print a copy of "Steven Covey's Seven Habits" and tape them to the fridge or other prominent place and read them often, we have a much greater chance of finishing this New Year with a sense of achievement:

Steven Covey's Seven Habits:

Be proactive. Don't stand still. Take the initiative and be responsible.

Begin with the end in mind. Start any activity, a meeting, run, day, or life, with an end in mind. Work to that end and make sure your values are aligned with your goals.

Put first things first. Prioritize your life so you're working on the important stuff.

Think win/ win. This is pretty obvious. You get what you put in.

Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Listen to emphasize, obtain information, and understand the other person's point of view.

Synergize. Work to create outcomes that are greater than the individual parts.

Sharpen the saw. Cultivate the essential elements of your character: physical, mental, social/emotional, and spiritual.

Why Stress is Stressful

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?" Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.

The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes."

He continued, "And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on.

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.

"So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can."

It is well know that too much stress is a "killer." Writing in Eternity magazine some time ago Fred Stansberry talks about "stress-related diseases such as cancer, arthritis, heart and respiratory diseases, migraines, allergies and a host of other psychological and physiological dysfunctions which are increasing at an alarming rate in our Western culture."

Stress is pretty much common to us all in today's pressure-cooker world. It is our responsibility, however, to do what we can to lessen the stress factors in our life wherever possible. To do this the following tips can help.

Write down all your cares and worries. Put them in order of priority and eliminate those that aren't important.

1. Know what your limit is and limit yourself to what you can handle.

2. With stress comes pent-up feelings. Learn how to express these creatively and get them off your chest.

3. Accept the fact that some things can't be changed.

4. Limit major life changes to as few as possible in any one year.

5. Resolve all resentments immediately.

6. Make time for rest and relaxation ... get sufficient sleep.

7. Watch your diet and eating habits.

8. Maintain a regular physical exercise program.

9. Ultimately, however, we need to learn to trust our life to God in all circumstances.

Learning From the Pigeons

During an experiment, pigeons were put in cages with one green and one red button. In one cage, the birds that pecked the green button got food every time. In the other, the green button yielded food erratically and the pigeons had to persist to get enough food. In both cases, pecking the red button did nothing. Both sets of birds thrived, learning what they had to do to survive and to ignore the red button that yielded no food.

But when the birds that were used to getting a reward every time were put in the cage that fed them only occasionally, they failed to adapt. They hit their heads against the cage and pecked wildly at everything in sight.

There are two worthwhile lessons from this study:

First, the pigeons quickly learned from experience to avoid the red button because it was unproductive. There are lots of people who would lead smoother and happier lives if they just stopped pushing red buttons that never give them what they want.

Second, even birds that have it too easy get spoiled and develop an entitlement mentality that prevents them from adapting to situations where they can solve their problems if they just work harder. Some people are like that, too. They don’t deal well with new circumstances, especially those that require persistence.

Part of being responsible is learning from experience to appreciate the benefits of tenacity and the wisdom of avoiding useless, harmful, and self-defeating patterns of behavior.

This is Michael Josephson reminding you that character counts.

Can you sleep when the wind blows?

Long time ago, a farmer owned land along the Atlantic seacoast.

He constantly advertised for hired hands. Most people were reluctant to work on farms along the Atlantic . They dreaded the awful storms that raged across the Atlantic , wreaking havoc on the buildings and crops.

As the farmer interviewed applicants for the job, he received a steady stream of refusals. Finally, a short, thin man, well past middle age, approached the farmer. "Are you a good farm hand?" the farmer asked him.

"Well, I can sleep when the wind blows," answered the little man. Although puzzled by this answer, the farmer, desperate for help, hired him. The little man worked well around the farm, busy from dawn to dusk,  and the farmer felt satisfied with the man's work.

Then one night the wind howled loudly in from offshore. Jumping out of bed, the farmer grabbed a lantern and rushed next door to the hired hand's sleeping quarters. He shook the little man and yelled, "Get up!  A storm is coming! Tie things down before they blow away!"

The little man rolled over in bed and said firmly, "No  Sir. I told you, I can sleep when the wind blows." Enraged by the response, the farmer was tempted to fire him on the spot. Instead, he hurried outside to prepare for the storm.

To his amazement, he discovered that all of the haystacks had been covered with tarpaulins. The cows were in the barn, the chickens were in the coops, and the doors were barred. The shutters were tightly secured.  Everything was tied down. Nothing could blow away. The farmer then understood what his hired hand meant, so he returned to his bed to also sleep while the wind blew.

When you're prepared, spiritually, mentally, and physically, you have nothing to fear. Can you sleep when the wind blows through your life? The hired hand in the story was able to sleep because he had secured the farm against the storm. We secure ourselves against the storms of life by grounding ourselves in the Word of God. We don't need to understand, we just need to hold his hand to have peace in the middle of storms.

Meaning of True Success

"A hundred years ago, Ralph Waldo Emerson noted three qualities he deemed marks of true success: the ability to discern and appreciate beauty, the ability to see the best in others, and a commitment to leaving the world a better place."

Emerson didn't say that success is in becoming a powerful politician, a wealthy business man or woman, a popular movie star, sportsman/ woman, an outstanding speaker. Nor did he say it had anything to do with physical beauty or material possessions. This is not to say that there is anything wrong, in and of themselves, with any or all of the above, but if this is our definition or measure of success, it has fallen far short of success in the eyes of God.

God's measure of success is, first of all, in studying and meditating on his Word, so we know what it teaches, and second, in obeying all of God's laws and living in harmony with his will.  Keep in mind, being a prosperous person has little if anything to do with material prosperity, but rather it has to do with knowing and obeying God's Word and living in harmony with his will. Also, having the qualities Emerson described above would also make one very prosperous.

And as another has said, "Judge your success not only by what you've become, but by what others have become because of you."

Don't we all need help

This is a true story of a man. I was parked in front of the mall wiping off my car. I had just come from the car wash and was waiting for my wife to get out of work. Coming my way from across the parking lot was what society would consider a bum. From the looks of him, he had no car, no home, no clean clothes, and no money. There are times when you feel generous but there are other times that you just don't want to be bothered. This was one of those "don't want to be bothered times." "I hope he doesn't ask me for any money," I thought. He didn't. He came and sat on the curb in front of the bus stop but he didn't look like he could have enough money to even ride the bus.

After a few minutes he spoke. "That's a very pretty car," he said. He was ragged but he had an air of dignity around him. His scraggly blond beard kept more than his face warm. I said, "thanks," and continued wiping off my car. He sat there quietly as I worked. The expected plea for money never came. As the silence between us widened something inside said, "ask him if he needs any help." I was sure that he would say "yes" but I held true to the inner voice. "Do you need any help?" I asked. He answered in three simple but profound words that I shall never forget. We often look for wisdom in great men and women. We expect it from those of higher learning and accomplishments. I expected nothing but an outstretched grimy hand. He spoke the three words that shook me.

"Don't we all?" he said.

I was feeling high and mighty, successful and important above a bum on the street; until those three words hit me like a twelve gauge shotgun. “Don't we all"?

I needed help. Maybe not for bus fare or a place to sleep, but I needed help. I reached in my wallet and gave him not only enough for bus fare, but enough to get a warm meal and shelter for the day.

Those three little words still ring true. No matter how much you have, no matter how much you have accomplished, you need help too. No matter how little you have, no matter how loaded you are with problems, even without money or a place to sleep, you can give help. Even if it's just a compliment, you can give that. You never know when you may see someone that appears to have it all. They are waiting on you to give them what they don't have. A different perspective on life, a glimpse at something beautiful, a respite from daily chaos, which only you through a torn world can see. Maybe the man was just a homeless stranger wandering the streets. Maybe he was more than that. Maybe he was sent by a power that is great and wise, to minister to a soul too comfortable in himself. Maybe God looked down, called an Angel, dressed him like a bum, and said, "go minister to that man cleaning the car, that man needs help."

Don't we all?

Therefore no matter how little you have, no matter how loaded you are with problems, even without money or a place to sleep, you can give help.

A Millionaire and Three Beggars

There was a good-natured millionaire in India. Three beggars thought of approaching him for help. The first man went to the millionaire and said: "O Lord! I want five rupees. Please give me." The millionaire was taken aback at this man's impudence. "What! You demand five rupees from me as though I owe you the money! How dare you? How can I afford to give five rupees to a single beggar? Here, take these two rupees and get away," he said. The man went away with the two rupees.

 The next beggar went to the millionaire and said: "Oh Lord! I have not taken a square meal for the past ten days. Please help me."

"How much do you want?" asked the millionaire.

"Whatever you give me, Maharaj," replied the beggar.

"Here, take this ten rupee note. You can have nice food for at least three days." The beggar walked away with the ten rupee note.

The third beggar came. "Oh Lord, I have heard about your noble qualities. Therefore, I have come to see you. Men of such charitable disposition are verily the manifestations of God on earth," he said.

"Please sit down," said the millionaire. "You appear to be tired. Please take this food," he said, and offered food to the beggar.

"Now please tell me what I can do for you."

"Oh Lord," replied the beggar; "I merely came to meet such a noble personage that you are. You have given me this rich food already. What more need I get from you? You have already shown extraordinary kindness towards me. May God bless you!"

But the millionaire, struck by the beggar's spirit, begged of the beggar to remain with him, built a decent house for him in his own compound, and looked after him for the rest of his life.

 God is like this good millionaire. Three classes of people approach Him, with three different desires and prayers. There is the greedy man full of vanity, full of arrogance, full of desires. He demands the objects of worldly enjoyment from God. Since this man, whatever be his vile desires, has had the good sense to approach God, He grants him some part of the desired objects (even these very soon pass away, just as the two rupees the first beggar got are spent before nightfall).

 The other type of devotee prays to the Lord for relief from the sufferings of the world, but is better than the first one, in as much as he is ready to abide by His Will. To him the Lord grants full relief from suffering, and bestows on him much wealth and property.

The third type he merely prays to the Lord: "O Lord, Thou art Existence-Absolute, Knowledge-Absolute, Bliss-Absolute, etc., etc." What does he want? Nothing. But the Lord is highly pleased with his spirit of renunciation, of desirelessness and of self-surrender. Therefore, He makes him eat His own food, I.e., He grants this man Supreme Devotion to Himself. Over and above this, He makes the devotee to live in His own House For ever afterwards this devotee dwells in the Lord's Abode as a Liberated Sage.